Sunday, January 28, 2007
Welcome to the Dollhouse
Even as a person of faith or maybe because of that fact, I find the following joke to be funny -- a mother goes to a priest and asks him to pray for her son in his next boxing match. The priest says that he will but he adds, it'll help if the kid can punch. I used to have a Bozo the Clown blow-up doll that I loved to hit until he became deflated from my punches and kicks, and I cried and cried. What had been destroyed could not be made whole, I thought, although I don't think I articulated it that way -- I think I said, I'm never going to be able to hit a clown again. How wrong I was about that sentiment!
Bozo was the kind of kid's toy that parents hate and that a fun uncle or aunt will bring over --something that makes a lot of noise and/or causes chaos subsequently driving the parents to drink gin straight for weeks. The worst version of this type of toy was when my mother was in the hospital and her roommate had a child with a Screaming Stevie doll. The doll would yell at random points, I'm Screamin' Stevie and I'm the boss! The doll was made by Matel, although I think it was designed by Satan for Matel, much the way Isaac Mizrahi designs for Target now. The last doll I bought for an adult was a Krusty the Klown doll from Krusty's appearance on "Treehouse of Terror." Krusty had three settings -- good, bad, and both good and bad. The good Krusty said things like, I'm Krusty the Klown and I love you very much. The bad Krusty said things like, Shut your hole! He was usually on the middle setting so you never knew what was going to come out of his mouth. It could be a message of love, it could be a hateful little ditty. At a certain point, I hated Krusty, all smug in his Conspiracy Museum of Dallas t-shirt. I bought the little bastard that shirt! He wasn't a tiny doll, but he was no inflatable Bozo either. It would have helped if I could have punched.
Michelle's Spell of the Day
"My mother always said love would set me free, but I've been a prisoner because of my love for you." Bride of Chucky
Drinking movie suggestion: Hannah and Her Sisters
Benedictions and Maledictions