Nothing bad has ever happened to me. Okay, that's a lie! I love starting the morning that way. Let me rephrase -- nothing bad has ever happened to me that has been broadcast over the internet. But that's not entirely true either. I tell lots of stories on myself each day and post them right here for you, dear readers. But nobody has ever videotaped me in a state of slurring misery like David Hasselhoff and had the courtesy of putting it on YouTube where it could be played over and over again by assholes like myself who enjoy the occasional trainwreck, provided we're not in it. It's an oh how the mighty have fallen sort of thing -- ie, there's the man who brought us the brilliance that is Knight Rider and Baywatch on the floor, being told by his teenage daughter that there would be "no more alcohol or else you lose your show, Dad."
It's Cinco de Mayo which puts me in mind of tequila, a mostly evil substance (I'm speaking of the cheap stuff -- El Torro comes to mind) that has led to two particularly bad moments, both on this date years ago. Very few people know what the hell happened historically on Cinco de Mayo except that we are treated to an endless display of Corona commercials which somehow has managed to become an integral part of decorating along with the chili pepper lights which remain popular in Texas. I am no exception when it comes to my own Cinco de Mayo history. I can only say that I'm glad nobody had a video camera or camera of any kind. Not that I was rolling around the floor, slurring my words like poor David H. Not that I said, I think I'm going to take off my clothes now before someone pulled me out the door. No, nothing like that. Let's just be glad I didn't have a show to lose. Kit, the groovy talking car on Knight Rider, would have never made it out of the parking lot if I had been behind the wheel.
Michelle's Spell of the Day
"Life is short, but desire, desire is long." Jane Hirshfield
Drinking novel suggestion: Cat's Eye Margaret Atwood
Benedictions and Maledictions
Happy Cinco de Mayo!