One of my friends, on the verge of divorce, said, Marriage is a lot like torture. The worst part is there is no end in sight. Even a marathon has a stopping point! In the midst of one of the most grisly parts, the division of the things, she'd hidden beneath her desk as her husband sold their washer and dryer to a stranger. It had been the thing she had always wanted to have at home and now it was gone. The specter of the grim laundromat loomed large, haunted by broken men with sad eyes, nursing cheap cups of coffee. My friend, a delicate doe-eyed beauty, said, I never even really loved him and now he's sleeping with someone ten years younger. We spent a lot of time the summer of divorce talking about the end of the things, the nature of loss, and why she couldn't stop sleeping with this horrible man named Pat who I referred to as Pat MIA because he couldn't be found for days on end and would show up at the worst possible times hoping for some loving. The term booty call had not yet entered the lexicon -- in those days this practice was referred to as being an asshole who couldn't commit. I had no idea dating was so horrible, she said.
One of my ex-boyfriend's toasts when he was drunk enough to feel sentimental was, Till the wheels come off. So it was for my friend when her hoopty of a marriage broke down. You can drive for a long time on an empty tank of gas, get out in the middle of nowhere. You step out when the car stops, try to get your bearings. Maybe you're somewhere far from where you started, more likely you've driven in circles. But whatever the case, it's strange to stop moving and stand on your own again.
Michelle's Spell of the Day
"A lover teaches a wife all that her husband has concealed from her." Balzac
Drinking memoir suggestion: The Year of Magical Thinking Joan Didion
Benedictions and Maledictions
Congratulations to my beloved Pistons for winning again at The Palace! Same score as last time (79-76 so close, so close!) -- to quote RIP Hamilotn -- If it ain't rough, it ain't right. Happy Friday, friends!