Friday, July 23, 2010

You've Lost That Loving Feeling

Thanks for the feedback on bookstores. No need to feel guilty about e-books or on-line publishing -- I stick to my advice, JR! But I do love love love bookstores and John Kings in Detroit and Ferndale are two branches of the most exceptional bookstore I have ever shopped. I'm not a huge fan of the boring chains that threaten to gobble them. If you have a minute and some extra money, please support your local used/independent bookstore. End of PSA.

So it's Friday, the summer, it's hot, I'm tired. I've gone all week without sleeping much and now the inevitable lethargy has set into my bones like some wicked drug. But I do have a Friday question and this one is for both genders, although it may apply more to the ladies than the fellows. Have you ever had a situation where your feelings about a friend have changed so dramatically that it's hard for you to stay friends with that person? I love my friends for their pilgrim souls and my friends know who they are, but I understand that situations/career changes/religious differences/ children/no children, can change how you feel about someone. How do you handle it?

Michelle's Spell of the Day
"You can always tell a real friend: when you've made a fool of yourself he doesn't feel you've done a permanent job." Laurence J. Peter

Cocktail Hour
Movie suggestion: The Kids Are All Right

Benedictions and Maledictions
Happy Friday! Checking email tomorrow -- so prepare to be answered if you have questions! Next week, prepare for a review of JR's new work!


the walking man said...

Honestly PD? The truth is I *shrug* wish them well from my spirit and soul to their spirit and soul and let them move freely to wherever they must go and think very little more about them.

I know that, be it a day or ten years, when friends meet again the dialog will pick up pretty much where it left off. Friendship is not situational or conditional. (A common mistake that occurs between people)

And I know nor have ever known a friend whose life has stayed so static that conditions and situations did not change. If they are friends the feeling for them need not change.

I think the short version is I have so few people in my life that I consider truly friends that even when the situations change, they are still friends and the feelings do not need to change simply because the situation (et al) has. I live comfortably without friends as easily as I do with.

Get some rest. You know the reason they never sent patients with consumption to Michigan was because it is NOT a dry heat. Humidity baby, it's all about the humidity.

G said...

I don't think it happens as an abrupt change, but rather its more of a gradual change.

I've been friends with people where we have slowly drifted apart until contact has been termed.

Sometimes the change is as large as different careers or boyfriend/husband/children, or as small as someone wanting to close one particularly painful chapter of their life that you happened to be in, and open another where you ain't.

Life goes on, and after mourning a friendship that used to be but now never will be, so do you.

Charles Gramlich said...

Yes, and I have some regrets about it. A good friend and I were having supper together one day when he called me stupid for an opinion I expressed. I never quite forgave him and our relationship was never the same and the split only widened over time.

Lana Gramlich said...

Yes, I've grown closer to & farther away from friends. It's just life. When I'm moving away from a friend, it's just that. I don't engage them as much, don't call or visit. Eventually they're out of my life. More often, however, I find that long time friends just dump me at the drop of a hat. I've grown used to it & don't seek new friendships as a result. I grew up alone (which is probably part of the problem,) & now I'm most comfortable that way.

Got the skull x-mas balls, btw--thank you! They're so cool!

jodi said...

Michelle, even with a new ipad for downloading books, I still will never be able to resist a good bookstore. On the friend front, I believe that you have the ones from the heart and the rest of them just evolve naturally. I have an old friend that went 'God crazy' and it just seems that we didn't have that much in common anymore. But I still care about her even tho, she is a little too forceful with her opinions. xoxo