Wednesday, December 09, 2009
The Whole World Is A Graveyard
A year ago today, I almost died. I can sort of get my mind around this knowledge, but only partially because I don't know that anyone can comprehend her own death. I can hear my dear Hank saying, That's because they're too busy imagining other people's death. He also enjoyed telling people, Homicide not suicide when they got perturbed. He's been dead for a handful of years now, and I still hear him all the time in my head as if nothing had changed. I had written a blog post every single day for two years and a year ago was the first time I missed a day. I hated missing even one day, although I have let up on my iron discipline a bit since the whole ruptured appendix debacle. A year ago today, the doctors said I didn't have a very good shot at survival. I had last rites, which was kind of cool. I'd recommend this even if you're healthy just to get it out of the way. Then I had some hope, and then the doctors finally said I got to go home (are there ever any sweeter words than these in any context? I don't think so) and hope that the sepsis didn't return. They had no real idea why I survived by their own admission. Or why nothing bad came of the whole experience -- I could have had the sepsis return or as a doctor friend told me, I'm glad you still have your memory. A lot of people have brain damage after the shock. Good to know.
But what I did get was far more than I could have imagined. All of my friends, readers, family (and most people fit into more than one category) showed me more love and support than I could imagine. I'm certainly not worthy of such love, but hey, I'll take it! I wish I could properly thank everyone, tell each person how their well wishes and small and large kindnesses brought me back from the valley of dry bones. And that you can learn to sing the songs of Zion in a foreign land, the land of illness and brokenness and return more grateful than ever.
Michelle's Spell of the Day
“Death is terrifying because it is so ordinary. It happens all the time.” Susan Cheever
Go have your favorite drink and celebrate, my dears!
Benedictions and Maledictions
Happy Wednesday! And yes my dearest Mark, the year of sickness is over. But I get a coney too!