So I get my lazy ass out of bed for yoga this morning, feeling a little worse for the wear (thank you two glasses of J&B scotch!), and tell myself it will be good for me. The yoga teacher at my gym, Donnie, often says a lot of groovy, new age things that keep me going through a routine (You're either growing or dying is a personal favorite) so I'm game when he asks the class if we want to try something new. My hearing isn't the greatest so I think he says, Line yoga and I'm all over that, yeah, yoga in a line, why not? but he has said blind yoga and all of a sudden I realize that I will have to keep my eyes closed for the entire class as an exercise in trust, intuition, and feeling my way through poses, not just doing them. Oh sweet Jesus. The room is freezing cold thanks to the fact that the furnace has taken this moment to die which Donnie takes as what people now refer to as a "teachable" moment. "You can feel the chill more intensely with your eyes closed." Indeed he is right. I'm cold, tired, and off balance, ready to fall on my ass at any moment. I sense my dead blind friend's spirit (Hank or the Hankster as my dad used to call him) is having some major ha has! at my expense.
But I'm stuck with myself as we all are, in the worst and best of times. Fight my way through the class and don't open my eyes. Donnie positions us against each other for the balance poses and tells us we're all a ship and not to take down the ship. We are not, he says, the Titanic. I don't have the slightest clue who I am touching which I'd like to say is a new situation for me, but hey, who am I kidding? I've been down this road before. Just not in a yoga class. I try not to laugh because Donnie is so earnest (You should vacuum with a blindfold and earplugs to see how it would feel to be without those senses. It's a way of learning courage.) I'm black and blue on a good day from running into stuff. Donnie's exercise might kill me! But for the rest of the day, I feel better than ever. I had my eyes closed for an hour in a cold, dark room with some creepy-ass hissing music with snake rattles in the background. I thought my nerves would be shot. But I'm happy to see again and to be near my space heater working on my memoir. Hank's last written words to me were Stay warm and write when you can. Which I'm trying to do.
Michelle's Spell of the Day
"Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. The fearful are caught as often as the bold." Helen Keller
Drinking movie suggestion: Dan In Real Life
Benedictions and Maledictions