Tuesday, October 31, 2006

This Is No Dream, This Is Really Happening



For a little over a year during my childhood, I developed the odd habit of rubbing my eyes for so long and with such ferocity that I'd break blood vessels underneath them, causing two bright scarlett rings to appear, giving my face a rather demonic slant. Of course, my parents told me to cease and desist. I wanted to and for a short time I would, long enough to heal and start the cycle again. The rings terrified me with that horrible recognition that I suppose everyone gets now and then -- I have done some real damage to myself, I must stop now! Coupled with the secret thrill -- I have power to do something awful. I can, in fact, cause destruction without anyone to stop me.

The irony was that my eyes had always brought me lots of attention -- I had a set identical to my father's (ala Rosemary's Baby -- She has her father's eyes!) and people loved them and often commented on them, describing them as knowing, and less frequently, haunted. No mistaking who she belongs to, I'd hear. I liked to observe people even then and seldom spoke unless asked a direct question. Became adept at answering the question -- What happened to you? about my bloody rings. Giving the only reply I could muster -- I did it to myself, which made me both glad and sad. How often do we get to take full credit for anything?

Michelle's Spell of the Day

"Awful things happen in every apartment house." Ira Levine, Rosemary's Baby

Cocktail Hour

Drinking movie suggestion: Rosemary's Baby -- a great Halloweenish flick about a the former Mrs. Woody Allen (this is while she was still Mrs. Frank Sinatra and before she was Mrs. Andre Previn) and a cast of crazies trying to get her to raise Satan's child.

Benedictions and Maledictions

Happy Halloween! Thanks to all the readers for the great comments!

15 comments:

The Cineaste said...

"Rosemary's Baby." I read the book and saw the movie. It's a Polanski. I really liked his work in "Chinatown" and "The Ninth Gate." His life has a decidedly Halloweenish cast to it. Almost as if he tried to be the agent of his own destruction at one point. Maybe Charlie Manson drove him to it.

JLCGULL said...

So you have pilot's eyes, Michelle. I do a bit of sky work myself. But my eyes are azure. They blend me in with my sky work.

The Quotist said...

Feel the wind/and set yourself a bolder course/keep your heart/as open as a shrine/you'll sail the perfect line.--B. Seger

Arnold Stang said...

One of my exes was a writer. She taught a graduate writing course at Wayne State when she was twenty. Quite an accomplishment. She liked Chinese eating places and was a drummer in a jazz band. She had a thing for Ginger Baker. I think she liked my interpretations of Matthew Arnold's prose works, but we eventually went our separate ways.

Brooke Shields said...

I don't mind doing toothpaste commercials. In fact I love doing them because I've got two great kids and I've always wanted to work with family.

Tom Cruise said...

Yes, I've gained weight, but Katie has lost lots. Everything evens out in the end.

The Thinker said...

I wonder if that book called "Thumbsucker" has anything to do with doing it to yourself?

Tired eyes said...

Poe Ballantine's "501 Minutes to Christ" is a trip. What a name. What a title.

Cheri said...

Rosemary's Baby was always one of my favorites- when my dad worked midnights when I was little (from 2 on) my mother and I would sit up and watch scary movies. Alfred Hitchock to The Fly to every Stephen King movie you could ever think of.

paul said...

myCajun Queen rockout Lady happyhalloween! R2 C2! Shazammmmmmm

Tim said...

Your eyes are very captivating, although I'm not sure I'd call them haunted. But they certainly are the first thing I notice in all your pictures - except maybe the one where you have the zippered dress on. :)

John Ricci said...

Dear Michelle,
Happy Halloween, darling girl. Champagne toasts and caviar dreams to you and yours. Lovely post as always. Bravo!

Anonymous said...

My eyes are generally squinted and fairly unremarkable. My hair, however, is awesome.

Thanks for the Halloween wishes. Tuesday + no money + not very many DC friends = A fine, restful Halloween at home. No problem.

JR's Thumbprints said...

Another interesting baby movie is "It's Alive." I love it when the baby crawls into the back of the milk truck, killing the delivery man. You catch a glimpse of the milk pouring out of the truck, turning to a nice creamy red. Something about a baby with a huge claw terrifies me, more so than bloody rings under your eyes. Nice post, Michelle.

Sheila said...

I have not seen Rosemary's Baby but in the last week I have heard it mentioned several times. I think I will check it out!