Birthday Thoughts

Thirty things I've learned in forty years (my list without thinking about it too much)--

There is more than enough of everything to go around.

I want to like lettuce. I don't. But I still kind of like salad. This is a profound mystery.

Every artist postcard I have on my bulletin board has met a bad end -- suicide, murder, overdose. Except Raymond Carver who died of lung cancer which is probably not a much cheerier option. Still, they had some pretty great lives.

Time does not heal all wounds.

Wearing high heels is worth the pain.

Whether your life is one wacky adventure or an unending heartache is largely a matter of perspective.

I really like to write. When it's going well and the house is clean. Which is about ten percent of the time. Still, I'd be lost without it.

When you can be kind, you should. When you can be clever, make sure your audience enjoys it.

If you bring some levity to any situation, you will always be welcome. Also if you bring good champagne.

Black and gray are my favorite colors. If I created paint chips, I'd have colors like Detroit Gray and Little Black Dress.

Prepare for the best. What you invite, usually shows up. If the worst comes knocking, well, maybe it's the best. Who the hell knows?

You know who your friends are in a crisis.

Charles Schultz was a genius.

Don't have too many ideas about what you will or will not do. These are almost always challenged.

Don't worry about what other people think. You live with your choices.

Avoid the sun. Your skin will thank you.

Woody Allen's best advice -- whatever works. Caveat -- what works for Woody in the love department, well, it might not work for you. Annie Hall is the saddest movie on the planet.

Make yourself happy. Takes the burden off of those around you.

God loves everyone. This can be upsetting sometimes, particularly if you're in a Gore Vidalesque fit of jealousy. It's okay. Deep breath.

Pets make people happy. Not me, other people.

Don't watch Dexter without checking to make sure your doors are locked first. This is important.

Do not try to change other people. This strategy will work as well as the likelihood of me getting a tattoo.

Don't let your appendix burst. Seriously. This is a bad idea.

Baby Grouchie sleeps a lot. He feels he's earned it.

The phrase "Kung-fu treachery" applies in a lot more situations than you might think.

Time is not on anyone's side. Moisturizer, though, does help.

When in doubt, Johnny Cash makes everything better.

I will watch James Gandolfini in anything.

I have better friends than I could ever have hoped for.

Put your energy toward what you want, not what you don't want.

It's never too late to change whatever you want.

Benedictions and Maledictions
Thanks so much for all the birthday wishes! You guys are the best!