Saturday, November 04, 2006

Cakes Men Love

I once made a man I loved a birthday cake. This was many years ago when my cooking skills consisted of having my mother make lasagna, freeze it, and then I would heat it in the oven and then present it to whatever unsupsecting victim I happened to be seeing at the time. Since my mother has died, I can only fall back on such staples as popcorn and soup, prepackaged soup that is. But box cakes don't require much either except that I bought frosting and Batman decorations for the top (he had written an elegiac poem about the possibility of Batman being one's friend and how great that would be -- this was his early work; he was in his forties), and I presented it to my then-boyfriend with a great nervousness. He made a bad poo face and said that it was too much and there was no way he'd be able to eat it. I felt as sick as if I'd eaten the entire layer of frosting myself. It stayed in the fridge for weeks, a testament to my stupidity about where we were in the relationship.

Years after this incident, I bought a book called Cakes Men Love. It was a campy little tome from the sixties that I purchased at Recycled Books and Records, one of the greatest used bookstores ever, located in Denton, Texas. Even so, I've never made another cake. My ex and I stayed together for years, years that eventually led to him wanting a birthday cake. He'd tell me his preference time and again, and I could never remember if it was for a white cake with chocolate icing or a chocolate cake with white icing and still can't. I kept remembering the first one as it looked in the trash, all its figures still on it. I usually saved the little plastic guys, washing them carefully in the sink and storing them in a drawer reserved for candles and confetti, all the happy ornaments of celebration. But Batman and his friend Robin went in the can. It seemed that Batman would not be hanging out at our house, not then, and not ever.

Michelle's Spell of the Day

"Our true enemy has not revealed himself." Mario Puzo, The Godfather

Cocktail Hour

Drinking movie suggestion: Broadway Danny Rose

Benedictions and Maledictions

Happy Saturday!

17 comments:

Allen Woody said...

That Broadway Danny Rose was such a card. Much funnier than Batman--and Robin. Those two really deserved to be canned. But Danny, he's a KEEPER!

Laura said...

Funny how one little incident can effect the rest of your life. I have decorated a lot of cakes over the years. My mother went to cake decorating school and when I was about 12 years old, she taught me how to master this skill. Now every time some special occassion comes up, they all look to me to do the cake. Some times, this can be a major pain in the you know what.

Carpe Diem said...

Isis going for the gusto.

Mgmt. 101 said...

Go the extra mile, especially for regulars.

Inspector Clueso said...

Yes, open it now. I suspect that is where you have hidden the poetry contest entry fees. Behind every great fortune there is a crime!

Peter's Principles said...

Hey, Isis. Try doing some heavy lifting. It's a lot better than kundalini yoga. And don't mix exercise and booze or you'll be trashed like Batman and boy blunder.

Carl Claudy said...

Wrong, Clueso. That's where she keeps the missing phallus.

Mark it with an "M" said...

Box cakes just don't have the same love as ones made from scratch.

Mr. Goodbar said...

Your boudoir photos are the cakes I love, Michelle.

Sheila said...

My boyfriend would have absolutely freaked! He loves all things batman and even if he didn't eat it (he isn't much with cakes) he would have showed everyone in the world how awesome the batman cake was and at least had a tiny piece and make everyone else eat it. You NEVER NEVER should make your girlfriend feel bad for making you a cake! That is so wrong! I am sorry your old boyfriend was mean.

Paul said...

Cajun Queen crownoftheBigD backatthesceneofthecrime O.M. readsomepoemsfromthestage
whodturndownanythingfromyou
mansoundlikeafool
MightyIsis
YouRockFoxyLady
ElectricBeam
Shazammmmmmm!
R2 C2!

Wichita-Lineman said...

I'm trying to imagine you in the kitchen with an apron on. It's a black apron with matching oven mitts. Cooking can be a stressful thing when you're trying hard to impress. Next time, just buy a cake. Maybe one of those ice cream cakes from Cold Stone Creamery. It impresses me every time Marian buys me one. They're very tasty.

Bird on a Wire said...

It amazing how much a gesture like making a cake can actually mean, how it is can be be sort of turning point, disasterous or otherwise, in a relationship. The Batman decorations sounded like a great touch.

John Ricci said...

Dear Michelle,
Lovely view and post entry, as always. I enjoyed it all and am glad you are no longer with such a clueless individual. With you in the room who would need baking anyway? To you and your valiant if unappreciated efforts, Bravo, caviar dreams and champagne toasts!

Tim said...

I'm sorry that incident put you off baking cakes, and I can't imagine anyone being that rude. Personally I love cake, and HOLY CHOCOLATE SPRINKLES, a Batman cake at that!!

JR's Thumbprints said...

Cake and beer do not belong together. Is there any Wertzberger Dark in that refrigerator? I don't see it on the floor. Cheers to Haggard's resignation.

Jamie said...

Man - what a loser. If someone bakes you a batman cake, how can you not be grateful, especially if it's your girlfriend making it for you?
I'd be happy if you wanted to bake a cake for me, and I'm already happily married.