Don't Stand So Close To Me

Hey guys -- thanks for all the great comments about cheating! I agree with Lana -- that level of distrust would be hard to take, as well as Jason -- a person always gets caught (the old Bible verse -- what is done in the darkness, will be made known in the light) and Chris' comment that abuse and neglect can push somone to go outside a relationship. Jodi's comment comparing the saintly Tiger Woods' fall from grace to a snowman in Texas made me laugh. Poor Tiger -- he's up to seven now, the latest a porn star. What's the old Chris Rock line about a man being as faithful as his options? Yikes. Apparently, he had access to a buffet table. Here's the next excerpt from my novel. I have five more ten page days (kind of like two a days that Texas high school coaches are so fond of in the August heat) and then I am finished. Thanks so much for reading!

Kristen told us that night if she got a boob job and a nose job, she might be able to get into Playboy someday. I could see her in one of the magazines in Shane’s fort, her picture growing more and more tattered in the elements while she had a glamorous, tortured life.

As I drive to another day in front of my Mac, making up stories out of the thinnest of facts and details, I feel boring in comparison. I’m thin with a big ass, but no noticeable breasts except when I wear a padded bra. Most of the time I got without a bra altogether, a sad attempt at a political statement that no one notices.

Being a feminist in the late 80s sucks. Ten years ago, I read Daddy’s Newseek every Friday, raiding his briefcase when he came home from work and cutting out articles about domestic abuse, sexual violence, equal pay for equal work. I still have the clippings. But the articles began to change, and I remember a column written by a woman who had left her first husband after reading the first copy of Ms. Now she felt stuck with the bulk of childcare while her ex dated women half his age. She dated men who made her pay for her own coffee with laundry quarters. Equality, she wrote, meant having to pay for everything while you ex-husband jetted off to Aspen with a big-breasted snow bunny half his age. She had a small head shot next to her column where she looked frumpy and worn down. It reminded me of my column, What Ever In The World Is So Wrong? Most of my teachers weren’t wild about my column given that the subject matter made them nervous. If only they had known I was sleeping with one of their colleagues, they would have really been disturbed. Don’t stand, as Sting sang, so close to me.

Michelle's Spell of the Day
"The first rule of holes: when you're in one, stop digging." Molly Ivins

Cocktail Hour
One more episode of Californication! Loved last night's shenanigans.

Benedictions and Maledictions
Happy Monday!