Personals

I used to make my students write personal ads as an exercise in audience. Let's face it; there are so many ways to go wrong despite the obvious meeting a psycho and having him hack you to bits. This happened to someone I know. Seriously. Back in the days before the internet, when the newspaper was the only venue for optimistic lonely hearts. I knew it was coming when he gave her a clown doll for her birthday. Note to men; no woman wants a clown doll ever. Anyway, let's say you don't have this fate in store. Even so, it's difficult. How to present yourself in words? To make yourself sound cool and not well, douche-like. This is the writing of champions.

I've never done it myself, looked for someone in a sphere that wasn't physical so I can imagine the challenge. A quick glance in this week's paper gives me a lot of material. My personal favorite -- a man who describes himself as having "beautiful black feathered hair." Okay, I automatically think about this man whose ad is pretty generic (no smokers, no drug addicts, no drama (this one always mystified me because what is a relationship if not a little bit dramatic?) with his feathered hair. It makes me instantly sad because I imagine a woman he loved once told him this (probably circa 1985) and he's remembered it to this day. We imagine ourselves through the scrim of love, write it out, however dated and lost it might be, the forms changing over time, but never enough to make a difference.


Michelle's Spell of the Day
"I love this mansion, though it is too many windows
...to open halfway each morning
...to close halfway each night."
— Jim Carroll

Cocktail Hour
Drinking snack suggestion: Will have pictures of drinking snacks posted on Friday!

Benedictions and Maledictions
Happy Monday!