We tell stories in order to live. Joan Didion wrote that and it's true -- we need narrative to make sense of our lives. And now another politico is in the news for his indiscretions -- the governor of South Carolina. The Clash asked the classic question for this scenario -- Should I stay or should I go?/ If I stay there will be trouble/ If I go, it will be double. No doubt, Sanford's troubles seem to go on and on. Not only does he have an Argentinian mistress (his soulmate -- pause for gagging sound), but he admits to "crossing the line" with other women. What does this mean? As each day passes, more information surfaces. To which I find myself wondering, Why not tell all at first?
Because, I suppose, it's not easy to admit to an extramarital affair. What story do you tell yourself about the circumstances? How do you believe that despite all the ones who have went before you (Spitzer, Edwards, Clinton, etc.), that you will somehow manage not to get caught? Sanford admits he's not in love with his wife. But that he plans to fall in love with her again. I think this is as likely as me translating Virgil this afternoon. The little Latin I know is Acta est fabula, plaudite! - The play is over, applaud! This seems to pertain.
Michelle's Spell of the Day
"Never let go of that fiery sadness called desire." Patti Smith
Cocktail Hour
Drinking movie suggestion: Any good summer movie suggestions?
Benedictions and Maledictions
Happy Wednesday! Happy Canada Day!
10 comments:
Coming clean always seems more dreadful beforehand than afterward.
Great post. I feel sorry for the South Carolina governor but not that sorry.
TC
Dear High Profile men in elected office:
Rule #1 Penis must stay at home while you are on the road, unless of course you're in the White House then it must stay on the private third floor not an ante room to the oval office.
(Come to think of it I wonder what George W. thought about when he went into that same room Clinton and Monica used as he was on his knees praying.)
Rule #2 Take a lesson from Henry Ford II "Never complain and never explain"
Rule #3 Be a man and put your balls on the kitchen island, the old lady is gonna have 'em for lunch anyway, may as well make it easier for her to use the tenderizing mallet.
Rule #4 Put Leon Russel's "If The Shoe Fits" on permanent repeat in your dim wit ear buds.
Michelle,
Ever seen the film 'One Crazy Summer'? It's worth it just for the scene with Bob Goldthwaite in a Godzilla costume. Most of the films I watch aren't very Summery, I'm afraid.
Hope your week's been treating you well, Darlin'. take care!
Loverly Michelle, We only tell the truth in these matters if we are caught or if we need to clear our conscience. Yucky either way. xoxo
Gov. Mark Sanford is acting like a love-struck teenager.
Or, maybe he has a deeper personality disorder, some experts speculate.
As the saga of Sanford and his Argentine lover continues, the public, the governor’s political rivals and some allies are speculating about the governor’s mental stability and whether he’s able to lead the state.
While mental health experts are reluctant to pin a diagnosis on the governor, their observations of his behavior suggest a chemical imbalance, narcissism and impulsive behavior.
“That’s a troubled man,” said Sen. Harvey Peeler, R-Cherokee, a longtime Sanford ally who this year became frustrated at Sanford’s refusal to take federal stimulus money. “You can see it in his eyes and his body language. I’m concerned about his mental well-being.”
John Crangle, executive director of Common Cause South Carolina, called Sanford “delusional” and said it was obvious the governor has “serious mental problems.”
Gov. Mark Sanford is acting like a love-struck teenager.
Or, maybe he has a deeper personality disorder, some experts speculate.
As the saga of Sanford and his Argentine lover continues, the public, the governor’s political rivals and some allies are speculating about the governor’s mental stability and whether he’s able to lead the state.
While mental health experts are reluctant to pin a diagnosis on the governor, their observations of his behavior suggest a chemical imbalance, narcissism and impulsive behavior.
Sanford has not sought professional mental health treatment, said Joel Sawyer, the governor’s spokesman.
But some fellow politicians are saying the governor needs help.
“That’s a troubled man,” said Sen. Harvey Peeler, R-Cherokee, a longtime Sanford ally who this year became frustrated at Sanford’s refusal to take federal stimulus money. “You can see it in his eyes and his body language. I’m concerned about his mental well-being.”
John Crangle, executive director of Common Cause South Carolina, called Sanford “delusional” and said it was obvious the governor has “serious mental problems.”
“The idea that he could carry on this relationship and at the same time be governor, run the Republican governor’s association and have presidential aspirations, it shows an individual who has lost contact with reality,” said Crangle, who has worked as a divorce lawyer. “He sees no limitations. He can do what he wants.”
One prominent Republican who is close to Sanford and has been in regular contact with him also has questioned the governor’s well-being. “When your support is evaporating but your resolve (to stay in office) is increasing, that’s a bad combination,” said the source, who did not want to be identified.
Peeler cites the governor’s mental state as one more reason he should resign. Crangle said Sanford should at least take a leave of absence and get a psychiatric evaluation.
The state Constitution has measures for removing a mentally unstable governor, but that’s not likely to happen in this case, observers said.
Still, people are talking.
Aside from political operatives, the general public is weighing in on Internet message boards and around dinner tables, saying Sanford needs mental help.
Psychiatrists, psychologists and other professionals who work with behavior disorders were reluctant to diagnose Sanford based on what they have seen on television or read in newspapers.
But a few were willing to offer theories as to what could be driving the governor’s behavior.
Susan Hardwicke, a licensed social worker who runs a clinical practice in Columbia, said Sanford could be under the influence of brain chemicals that fire when a person falls in love.
“People do crazy things for love,” Hardwicke said. “That’s what all the songs are about. Nobody in their right mind would do what he’s doing.”
This behavior is temporary, she said. Research shows romantic love lasts less than two years. (Sanford’s term as governor has 18 months remaining.)
Sanford’s public declarations of his love for his Argentine lover are reckless, but that’s how those tbrain chemicals make people act, Hardwicke said. Those affected are like drug addicts, she said.
“He’s being ‘the man.’ He’s showing how much he loves her,” Hardwicke said. “I don’t know any governor who says, ‘My lover is my soul mate.’”
Jane Arave, a licensed professional counselor at the Northeast Counseling and Learning Center, said Sanford’s behavior mimics that of former President Bill Clinton.
“They get a thought in their heads and they can’t stop themselves,” she said. “It’s has to be a driving force they can’t stop. They don’t think of the consequences. It’s impulsive behavior.”
State Sen. John Land, D-Clarendon, said he thinks Sanfords’ issues go deeper. He described Sanford as narcissistic.
“He seems to revel in and enjoy these intimate details as if his love affair was the most perfect one,” Land said. “If the rest of us did this, it would be a second-rate love affair. He’s not in touch with reality
I find myself wanting to put aside my partisan predilections and dwell for a moment on the human condition here. Yes, he cheated on his wife, he broke his contract with the party.
but, just as a human being, can we not acknowledge his candor in not throwing his paramour under the bus for political expediency? Maybe it's not always a mistake when you fall in love with someone who's not your wife.
I'm inclined to give him some space to figure out where he is with his allegiences. I'm intrigued by his candor.
I think "planning to fall in love with a particular person is not a very good plan. Sure would be nice if it could happen, I guess.
how's that old saw go? easier to ask forgiveness than permission?
The bottom line, I think, is that you don't get into these kinds of positions of power unless you're a narcissist...and, as such, you might want to simultaneously present yourself as a good Christian warrior for morality on a high white horse and as a major stud with babes in numerous countries...and, of course, you're gonna lie your pants off once the contradiction gets exposed...
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