All The News That's Fit To Print

Still recovering from evil summer cold, but can't resist some of the recent news bits. Jack White has a divorce party -- I approve. Who says divorce can't be as celebrated as marriage? Anthony Weiner. Ummm, hope he has a hands free phone. Couldn't resist. But the man has suffered, let's face it. When Jane Lynch and Bill Maher read your tweets on air, it's pretty awful. All sex talk sounds horrid out of context. Mr. Weiner is no Henry Miller. But how he does go on like Henry! And I'm getting pretty sick of the whole rehab thing. You do something questionable and then straight to rehab! While the man may suffer a sex addiction (and I don't know if that's real or Memorex, as the old ads used to say), why rehab? Are there no therapists in all of Queens? One thing we do know -- there are places where a man can get his chest waxed.

And the Mavs -- well played! Clearly, Cleveland put a curse on King James who looked as one of my friends puts it, scared stupid the entire finals, particularly last night. I get pressure, but what happened to the warrior I once watched on the courts? A formidable opponent against my beloved Pistons, I wonder the question that scholars and philosophers have posed since the beginning of time -- What. The. Fuck? So that's all for today -- back tomorrow!