Every Tongue Shall Confess

When I was in the ninth grade, one of my close friends had gone through an exorcism. She was a big tall girl, a fellow gymnast named Sheila, and she'd had the elders of the Pentecostal Church of God with Signs Following take her down into the bowels of the rec center, where many a VBS class was held and the church elders spoke in tongues and cast out demons for over an hour. Sheila, strapped to a metal folding chair for her "protection," sat there and prayed to become whole. Sheila had the kind of frightful family that was wrought with sexual abuse, bringing to mind the old joke -- what is a virgin in (fill in name of southern backwater state) -- a nine year old who can run fast. (Oh the wit!) Sheila had a beautiful body and a damaged soul and even I could tell that it would take more than a bunch of dudes chanting stuff to make things better. She suffered the classic post-traumatic stress symptoms, demons all, except not the kind the men imagined them to be.

Even so, I'm bigger on the power of belief than anything else. Lots of people I know practice speaking in tongues and the laying on of hands like I might think about buying a Dr. Pepper. Sometimes people ask, Will it scare you if I speak in tongues? Rock out, I say, and watch the show. I'm not so great at handling the problems in my life -- find that I turn to strange and mighty things in moments of desperation (that would be nearly all of them) and that those things often save me. I'm not going in for my weekly exorcism any time soon, but I love the idea of a deliverance from whatever is troubling me, even if, and perhaps especially if, it's only myself.


Michelle's Spell of the Day

"The best way to say anything is just to say it." Johnny Cash

Cocktail Hour

Exorcism

1 part gin
1 part lemon juice
1 teaspoon of sugar

Serve over ice.

Benedictions and Maledictions

In Memoriam: Ann Richards, former governor of Texas and one of the most fantastic versions of womanhood anywhere! She famously said of George W. that he was born with a silver foot in his mouth among many other brilliant, funny things. She will be missed!